Although gestational surrogacy requires solid legal and medical expertise it is the best family-building option for LGBTQ. In the case of surrogacy journey for Gay parents, embryos are created in a laboratory at a fertility clinic using the biological materials of intended parents (either one or both) and an egg donor, and then a carefully matched surrogate carries the baby to term.
At first glance, it may sound a little overwhelming or complicated, but please don’t worry, you’ve come to the right place and we are here to guide and make the surrogacy process easy. Keep in mind that Surrogacy is a long and emotional process but the best way for you to build the family of your dreams. Our extensive experience working with the LGBTQ+ community helps us understand your psychological, sensitive moments and support you accordingly.
Understand the difference between Gestational and Traditional surrogacy
Considering 2 types of surrogacy exist, traditional and gestational, there are several cases when gay parents prefer to use the first one. Let us quickly explain the difference and honestly share our company policy about it.
- Traditional surrogacy means that the surrogate mother is also the baby’s biological mother. During such arrangement oocytes of the surrogate and sperm of the intended father are used to create embryos.
- Gestational surrogacy is the process when “in vitro fertilization” (IVF) is used to create embryos with an egg donor’s oocytes and sperm from the father, and the embryo is placed into the uterus of a gestational surrogate.
For us, common practice is gestational surrogacy only. During this process, gestational carrier is not genetically related to the child and it makes it easier to manage the legal side. In many countries where surrogacy is allowed local healthcare and the juridical system assign parentage to either you or your partner, regardless of gender identity. Your name(s) are included on the child’s birth certificate and you are able to take your baby back to a home-based well-planned process.
Prepare and do your homework
There is a lot of useful information available on Google. When you type the “Surrogacy for Gay parents” a bunch of links pop up. Ok, you may get confused, and stuck but again do not be, usually on the first page, this search system comes with the most reliable information, however, you may also encounter outdated information too.
- The biggest obstacle that gay parents encounter is the legal framework of destination countries since otherwise, the surrogacy process is similar for everyone. In order to better understand which country suits you best, make a pros and cons general list about the country, its legal framework, and agencies operating there.
- Search Facebook groups, check some feedback and try to have a consultation with agency coordinators, and owners. Calculate the budget and ask for any hidden or possible costs. It’s always better to have everything written to sit down and check, compare and select the best option for your family’s growth. Surrogacy always needs funds, but the good thing is that you do not need to pay the full amount of the program at once, usually payments are per installment and linked to the process flow.
- If you are looking for live birth guarantee programs ask about time limits, total budget, and expectations and openly share your doubts, questions, and concerns. Never be afraid of asking questions even if you think that it may sound a bit strange, go ahead, ask, get the answers and feel if it is right for you.
Choosing the Right Surrogacy Agency
After homework, you already should have 2-3 shortlisted agencies. We can give tons of hints that will help you to have the right selection process. For example:
- How quickly do agency representatives reply?
- How confident are they in their replies?
- Are they open and transparent?
- Are they afraid to share some disadvantageous information? (Well, everyone is happy to share positive and good sides)
- Do you feel they will be with you on every step?
- You of course are aware that during the surrogacy journey there may be ups and downs, you may have failures, disappointments but most important is if you feel that your agency is with you, supporting, consulting, and guiding you during a difficult period.
Tamari Kachlishvili, the founder of GS Consulting, has been helping LGBTQ+ couples become parents for many years. Her vast experience in surrogacy is invaluable and we know how much planning, coordination, and compliance with regulations are needed for each surrogacy journey.
The Pros and Cons of Surrogacy for Gay Couples
While surrogacy is an option for LGBT couples or individuals who want to add to their families, it may not be an option for everyone. Let us share some benefits and challenges that Intended parents need to consider before engaging in surrogacy:
Pros:
- You are planning your life and you decide where and with whose help your loved baby is delivered, usually, medical team is and should be LGBTQ+ friendly
- You are controlling the process and you are meeting with so many wonderful, brilliant people who are by your side during the whole surrogacy journey
- You have a biological connection with your most desired child
- You meet with an amazing surrogate who can be a part of your life if you wish, too.
Cons:
- Surrogacy for LGBTQ+ People is allowed only in a few destinations, so you may need to travel quite a long distance to make it happen.
- Surrogacy generally is an expensive and financially heavy process, furthermore considering distances and living expenses you may have in the destination country it further increases the financial burden on you.
- Although social opinion is slowly changing and gets tolerant of LGBTQ+ People having kids, still you may encounter a judgmental environment, and you may feel a little down.
Well, what else we can say? Surrogacy is a wonderful, life-changing memorable but complex journey. GS Consulting proudly offers programs in Argentina where same-sex marriage was legalized in 2010 and where the LGBTQ community and their rights are some of the most progressive in the world.